Sunday, August 26, 2007

Self discovery

I recently discovered that the process of self discovery also drives human beings.What you like or hate now will not evoke the same feelings the next year,next day or closer,next moment.I think this phenomenon is common to all in our species.My dabbling around with many things in life have proved to me beyond doubt that my life will never be monotonous.This I say because I believe that thought designs character,it is character that devices your life.By statiI ng this I guess,,I am deviating slightly from the stand that I normally take on the turn of events in life for which my explanation borders spirituality.Right now,I am looking forward to the next phase of my life which promises to bring new experiences and an entirely different strata of life in terms of quality.Right now I see this as an oppurtunity for living out a few of my dreams,few material,few to the mind,few for the body.I am also looking to take forward my latest love in life,,,the lenses to a different platform.This episode of dire straits romance has proved to me once again that I do not yet completely know my potential of expertise in mundane fields.Photography has become an integral part of my palette these days .These days I am looking for beauty in all its colors.Although I understand my juvenile status in this form of art,I am willing to take it step by step.They say poetry is an abundant and spontaneous outflow of emotions.I would define photography as the unsaid capture of emotions on paper.Now I realise that I can communicate well breaking a few barriers Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.This was Einstein.I completely agree with this after bathing many such experiences.I am really not sure what else I am capable of.I am awestruck looking at the capacities of a Mittal,a Buffet,a Ambani with their enormous man management skills.I still dream of a day when there would be plentyful man management ability in me enough to run my own eneterprise.Undreamable dream,I havent achieved many of my dreams.But I am living a dream which is more gigantigue and grand than my own standard of dreaming.This I realise very well and this I think is one of the secrets of contentful living.And the slow discovery of this secret can be termed as life and its zillion complexities.Maybe Freud can say it better.And one day may be I will discover myself completely.That sounds like blasphemy I guess.So let me stop my blabbering here and ponder on.

Friday, August 17, 2007


Since long I have wondered what drives me.

If I think this question can be answered elaborately answered myself,a lot of my problems can be solved. Well,I dont want to say that my life is a pictursque gallery of problems,but I am just eloquently explaining my blog entry into gathering some interest.

In the beginning there were mistakes in life,there still are.But thinking of them now sends a strange chill ,and I shake my head in disbelief questioning my memory.

Was it really me who did the such and such event?

Can you imagine how it feels?

They have shaped me into what I am now.My falling out of many a race has chugged me on to win that many more or more.My tasting sucess has often thrown me into a zone that is unexplicable yet enthralling.Only I can feel it and only for myself.Probably this is what is defined as a 'high' according to human language.I treasure them with utmost love and excitement.This experience of self realisation is the reason why succeeding in life is always on top of my priority list.I bet many others will agree with me on this explanation based on their personal experiences.

I understand that me being termed 'overreactive'stems from the many things that enter my mind whose behaviour resembles pictursque fireworks.I know it is shortlived,but yet powerful.I deem such fireworks as a dangerous lighter of joy and a destructor of festivities when its intentions are toppled.The line that separates the two outcomes is thin.

In the height of such mental fireworks ,sometimes I end up doing the most stupid things in life.For example,here I am sitting at my cosy room,becoming a member of this blogging community and writing something that a few moments ago looked like the prologue to my mind's karyotype.Unfortunately that now I fear is not to be.

It is a good 15 minutes wasted in writing non sensical prose,very efficiently signifying my mind's status.Cluttered.

Signing off.