The curious case of me!!

Someone recently commented that my behaviour and mannerisms resembles that of an old man. I began to wonder about the traits that possibly were responsible for that stranger to have such an impression of me. In this ‘world’ that pisses me with its ever changing fashion trends, void-filled friendships, fast track romances and monetary reasons for existence, I would presume, it shouldn’t surprise me if anyone finds me a stand out specimen. Then again, why me? I am not happy that the person felt such. It shouldn’t have been like that. I must change myself; mould myself to the world of today.

What is wrong with me? Have I started assuming that I come from another era? How about “The curious case of JAYANT JUDILSON”? I googled to find out what possibly can be the required changes to bring in a more dashing and interesting personality.

Then I realised that I mustn’t bother. If someone thinks anything about me, and specifically, if anyone feels or thinks ill about me, the picture above this blog is all for you. Enjoy!!!

I have a white Ferrari, the Ferrari with a capital F.

Today was a nice day and tomorrow will be better. Which day wasn’t and wouldn’t? I read a book titled, ‘I bought the monk’s Ferrari’’ written by a corporate honcho called Ravi Subramanian. This writer is an IIM-B alumnus and has done well for himself in his banking career. In his attempt to give back voluminously to the world that he cherishes, he has written this book that is parallel yet in some junctures questioning the other famous book on similar lines, ‘The monk who sold his Ferrari’ by Robin Sharma.
To me a Ferrari is a short, wide, powerful car. A red car. I like the sound the most followed by its sleek tiger like rear design. But for the rest of the educated world it means more. It means, panache incarnate, global status symbol, a rich man’s toy, an answer to a mid-life crisis, a proof of piles of stock money and the finest cars in the world. A Ferrari is not a spec sheet of an automobile. It is a dream.
The author eloquently equates Ferrari with an image of the reason of human existence. He describes it as the pinnacle of one’s worldly sojourn which everyone should aspire. It means ultimate happiness, success, contended and uncomplicated life. But the author deftly also manages to remind the readers that his definition of the pinnacle is not necessarily accepted by all and that different people like to take different stances. The corporate player that he is, he equates success with quick pay rises, promotions, perks, international holidays, mansions, private jets and islands, although he claims his teachings can be applied in all fields. He is also quick to dismiss the escapists who say that the Ferrari comes with a price, a heavy one that would not let you pursue alternate interests, high mental an emotional stress, and little or no time for the family. “You have to realise one thing that the Ferrari is not owned by millions. It is only for the crème de la crème. As it is they are fewer in number…even fewer among them own the Ferrari’’. This book professes that only people with Ferraris are happy. He enlists Ten Commandments for attaining the Ferrari which is explained in good detail in the book.
1. To acquire the Ferrari you need to aspire. And when you aspire, do not compromise for anything but the best.
2. Be optimistic, chase the negative thoughts away. A positive frame of mind will surely get you closer to your Ferrari.
3. Do not whine and whimper about ‘work-life’ balance. Be the winner, not the wimp, and the Ferrari will be yours.
4. Set and follow the highest standard of integrity in your personal and professional lives. If you are high on integrity, people will respect and value you. The Ferrari when it comes will stay with you.
5. Value your time and of the others, and be rest assured that the Ferrari will come to you.
6. No one is perfect. The moment you think you are, it is the countdown to doomsday. Earning the Ferrari is all about upgrading yourself, improving your skill sets and equipping yourself for the future. And for this, the initiative has to be yours.
7. Identify the owners of the Ferrari and align yourself with them. If you are in the company of successful people, their success will rub off on you. You need to back it up with stellar performances. If you live in Ferrari town, chances are, you will get to drive one sooner.
8. Share your success with others. If you commit to uplift the downtrodden you will become the true owner of the Ferrari.
9. Remain in perfect shape and fighting fit. No one will entrust you with a Ferrari if you cannot drive it.
10. If you have followed all the commandments with dedication and determination, it is the time to build up a profile for yourself. Target your audience and announce your achievements. You will own the Ferrari in no time.
After the Ten Commandments, the author escalates our imaginations further when he reveals the FERRARI.
Fortune for Every Right Rigorous And Resourceful person.
I beg to differ with this concept. I do not agree with the fact that only winners are happy. I do not believe fortune brings happiness. I do not also believe that all right, rigorous and resourceful people will have fortune.
If there is a competition, there can be one winner-The whole world is competing for fortune- Does that mean only the richest person in the world is happy?
I think it is at this point where I think Robin Sharma’s book did slightly better. I think the yogi in the book gave a place for non-winners a place to dwell in this biosphere. The yogi teaches the protagonist how worldly achievements should not come on the way to a happy, peaceful and content life.
From a spiritual point of view, I believe that it is the sinful human self that is necessitating the need for such senile books. I think only unconditional love can negate FERRARI. If love is what every organism seeks, then the need for fortune is annihilated.

I wrote a poem a few years ago when I was competing in the Premedical examinations and misfortune didn’t let me achieve what I desired and deserved. I was right, rigorous and resourceful. After that episode, I learnt to live with what I get and be happy and content with it. I wrote a poem during those wonderful days.

Life- the expressway

Life, the expressway
Has something posh near something rickety
Drivers come on, some happy and some sad,
Sad because of their possessions and happy for the same,
Sad because of their consistent breakdowns
And others because of their low speeds in the top gear,
Happy is the man who takes the breakdowns in his stride
And is happy of his steady speed.
Sad is the man who changes shades looking at attractive fellow drivers,
But happy is the man who sticks to a single shade, loyal to his conscience
Life the expressway is with too many so called unwanted round-a-bouts and red lights
Happy is the man, who follows traffic lights and sad is the one to whom fine follows for breaking rules,
Happy is the man who learns from the past and is smart
Sad is the man who is full of confidence and is over smart
Above all,
Life is an endless expressway where anybody and everybody are everybody and anybody.

I have a Ferrari with a capital F because I realised Microsoft word processes Ferrari with a capital F. My Ferrari is uncharacteristically white, because I prefer zero entropy.

An optimist.

My sister wrote this poem a couple of years ago. I didnt make much of it then. Now I do.

I saw a dream; I am hurt
I knew it was a sham,
Yet I tried to be an optimist,
But it had to struck me,
It was all a sham you shattered me,
I was blind; I saw a dream,
I heard your plosive sound,
Still murmuring in my ears.
You are a tenuous individual to me now,
U can’t break me,
I am efficacious to break the evil strands,
My smile, construe my intelligence,
I am diligent,
My innocence construes my strength,
Will cover the interstice in my life,
Nothing is impermeable,
After all I am an optimist,

The tulips are (were) dejected.

How my mind wills, if only it was untrue,
My heart yearns, reverse time right through.
You were a heavenly butterfly, brought abundant happiness,
Swaying your way through life defining indefinite finesse.

The memories have dried on my heart so dearly
Of a dash that was that was so lovely, surreal and rosy.
The tulips were happy in the bright life’s sunshine,
The little drought saw a flood, sent crashing one on nine.

Announcement time !!

This post is addressed to all my good old friends who are away from prying distance of me. After so much apprehension, I hereby relent to answer your constant questioning about my love life. With great happiness and pleasure I would like to divulge the details about the love of my life. My sincere self would like to announce the reason for my existense! I am shouting to the world the identity of my every breath! I am drooling to praise God's creative expertise! I know not and wish not to know the extent happiness that I am feeling at the discovery of this angelic soul! The power of love has enabled me to gatecrash diabolical designs of the earthly rulers! I am free! I am in love !Yes, I am dating this girl in the above pictures. I am not going to reveal her identity as we think it is not a good time yet to do that. I clicked all these above pictures. I hope this puts most of the questions to rest.

Post scriptum: Doubting Thomases are welcome to come and visit me in London. Please do not call my parents to verify.

Jayant J.J
1/4/2009

Something to ruminate..

The picture above is my latest painting using just six basic colours not including black.


If a friend in need is a friend indeed, then technically and logically, I must not believe in friendship. I certainly do believe in God's angels.

Juliana- A real story.

I hated my job and I hated the office. My colourful love for life seemed a tad unclean. I was heftily digging into a shelf of patient notes when I overheard a conversation between two people discussing GOD, specifically Jesus Christ. My neurons upstairs threw up stoically. Distressed and moaning, I cursed them for being another couple of morons setting up more examples of talk to convince-show not in doing lifestyle
Three days into my job, on that fine day, I realised that in a hurried morning I had left behind my mobile phone and wallet at home. Very often in the media we come across images of hunger struck human beings specially children, all malnourished and bony and on the edge of their lives. I had hardly ever before imagined how it would feel to not have a meal to eat. I had skipped breakfast that morning and was not carrying my mobile phone too, which added hunger and loneliness in the city of London.
On that cold afternoon at Russell Square, I walked not knowing how to overcome hunger. I had all the money in the world that I need, yet not a morsel to feed myself. This predicament made me aware of an aspect of life largely not thought of. My hungry heart went out to the impoverished and malnourished.
Stirring up my brains for ideas, I walked up to SOAS (School of Oriental and Asian studies) to get food at the ISHKON devotees who I heard give away food for anyone who wants to eat. To my dismay, they were missing since I was probably a wee bit too early for lunch at 12:30. Then I strode towards ULU where a pretty face supposedly gives koffee to thirsty souls at Koinonia, a student outreach program of a Christian group. As it has always been, she wasn’t there.
Heavy hearted sigh. I walked back to my office, a good 700 metres of meandering mind and a hungered body. As a last resort, I had to borrow. I had a friend in office. Adrian. [Good Morning- Bye- see you tomorrow] kind of friend. He was not there too.
Enter. JULIANA. The protagonist of this story. A stranger. Oh wait. She owes me something. My curses. I had given it to her the previous day for her conversation about GOD. A mouthful. De Facto Plenty, sufficient to keep me warm for the rest of the evening. With my AAIDU acquired crocodile skin, I approached for some money. 5 pounds maybe. She warily gave me 2P+2P+50p+20p+20p+10p not bothering to even acknowledge my three thankus. I happily ran out of the office and picked up some food and ate heartful. I then promptly returned to work and went home at 5 PM. All through this failed to realise someone watching me carefully, my darting about in the office and eating like never before.
I came to office next day, guarded with my wallet and loads of confidence. During my lunch break I went out to the money machine, took money for myself, brought lunch and a galaxy chocolate bar for JULIANA as a token of appreciation and came back to office. I went up to Juliana and give her the cash and the chocolate. She promptly told in her African big momma accent that she doesn’t need the money back. I persist saying that I will be eternally thankful for her help, but she need not refuse to take it back. But the African steadfastness came to the fore and she told that she appreciates the chocolate and would take that, but pleaded the other way with the money. She said, “You are younger and I can buy you lunch. Please”. Then she gave me a hug. Although not the one to be emotional in public, I had to fight hard to keep my eyes dry, that moment. I went back to my desk.
An avalanche of impulses were criss-crossing my central nervous system and I realised I had not stopped committing the sin of judging people. I had also temporarily lost hope for a few weeks in humanity and the abundant mercy of God. I have it back now.
Juliana, I still remember you fondly. God bless.
ps:I left that job after a week.